Dearest Darling Friend,
I read something that made me laugh. In the next minute, I was thoughtful. In the minute after that, I understood how deep the words were. Sharing it with you. If possible, do the activity. That way the results are better and deeper. Here it goes....
Throw down a ceramic plate.
Ok. Done.
Did it break?
Yes
Now say 'sorry' to it.
Sorry
Did it get back to the way it was?
No
Did you understand anything?
...
...
...
...
...
(Sheepishly)...Yes
For a few moments after reading it, I was completely silent. It was as if the words were finding its permanent place inside my memory. It was as if, they wanted to be out of sight but never out of mind.
I remembered a conversation I had the other day with my friend Shashank Bhagavatullah. He was narrating an incident that his brother witnessed when he was working in Singapore. For a meeting with the boss, an employee came 15 minutes late to office. He immediately went to the boss's cabin and said, 'I am sorry'.
The boss looked at him squarely and said, "There are two possibilities why you are late. Either there was something more important than our meeting. In that case, you did the right thing by doing that first. Hence, there is no reason for you to say sorry. Or, you were disorganized and lazy. In that case, your sorry has no value. You see, in both cases, there is no need to say 'sorry'?"
Do you say sorry often? Do you resist saying sorry? Do you say sorry because you feel so? Do you say sorry to escape a difficult situation? Do you find it suffocating to say sorry even when you know you are wrong? Do you find justifying your action/inaction more to your style than 'saying' sorry?
Do you find it easy to forgive people AFTER they have said sorry? Do you find it hard to let go even if people are genuine about a mistake and have said sorry?
What is your relationship with 'sorry'? It's worth thinking! It just might change something about you. It has changed something inside of me!!!
With love, prayers and exceptional wishes,
naren
Learn. Earn. Return.
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